Part 1

I don’t know if there is some filmophile chef out there who thought about naming dishes after films he enjoyed, so I’m going to go ahead and presume there is at least one such person, and to him I say: Bonjour (because, of course, he’s French), forget about all that Bande à part roast and the Une femme est une femme mousse and let’s concentrate on something a bit more recent and less snobby. Here are, for your free use, kind monsieur or madame, six films inspired more or less delicious dishes. You’re welcome.

1. Grave of the Fireflies

The film

This 1988 Japanese animation accounts the story of two siblings struggling to survive on their own during WWII, after they lose their mother in one of the bombings that destroys their home. With no news from their soldier father and with an aunt who, in a great imitation of Cinderella’s stepmother, unwillingly offers them shelter, the two improvise a „home” on the outskirts of the village and try to make ends meet until the end of the war. Being that this is an animation, one would imagine, as it is learned from the almighty Disney, that everything will be ok, the father will come back home with his arms full of sweets and rice and he’ll punish the evil aunt by stabbing her with his ship (kids do love a good bloody revenge) and everyone will live happily ever after. Right? Right?!

Spoilers ahead

Grave of the Fireflies
photo missnati.deviantart.com

No. They both die. Take that, dewy eyed children everywhere! The end.

The more or less delicious dish

In order to replicate this heartbreaking story for the taste buds, we need a beautiful looking soup, creamy and rich, such as is needed to draw children and childish adults close, before slapping the childhood right out of them with the harsh realities of life. The animation of this movie is truly beautiful, so our dish needs to be good looking, too.

The main ingredient of our recipe is the Wasabi sauce. Aside from providing the lovely green colour of the soup, it will also make you cry from minute 1 until the very end, which is a must if we want to stay true to the movie-inspiration. Even more, this miracle ingredient will make sure that you will be haunted by this soup for days to come, as it is sure to have some painful effects on your whole digestive system.

For the finishing touch, drop in there a few sweet dumplings – just to provide for a much needed relief from all the horror. You will see that this only increases the shock of having to return to the hot sea of pain the few sweet patches of hope seem to be drowning in.

Voila! The Grave of the fireflies hot soup, or, as I like to call it, Staring in the face of sorrow.

Grave of the Fireflies
photo www.badhaven.com

Here is the trailer:

2. The Cabin in the Woods

The film

It starts as just another horror movie, with the introduction of the characters who we all know are going to die horribly during the next 90 minutes, while we enjoy every second of their demise. Then, everything changes in an extremely unexpected way, which is the best thing that could happen to this sort of movie. I’m not going to say more, because, for those who haven’t seen it, it’s better to know as little as possible about it, and for those who have seen it, I’m sure they still remember it. Why? Because it’s like a pleasurable slap in the face, even for people who are not into that sort of thing.  You go prepared for some good old gore and you get so much more, like if you got all the presents from Christmas and your birthday on the day you celebrate six months since you’ve stopped looking at cat videos on the internet.

The Cabin in the Woods
Photo nardio.net

Without giving anything away (although, seriously, you should have seen it by now, even if you don’t like horror movies, just like you should see Star Wars even if you’re not into Sci-Fi), I can make a chart of the emotions an average spectator(which I consider myself to be) will go through:

1. Complete relaxation: a great part of the fun is guessing the order in which the characters are going to die. Of course, we’re probably going to get stuck with the most boring of them, the nice girl. At least the annoying blonde is a goner.
2. Puzzlement: there are some scenes that don’t really make sense and you can’t figure out the connection between the two segments.
3. Ok, so you start to understand a bit, but not enough, and alternate between feelings of excitement that it’s finally beginning (the action, that is) and frustration that nobody explains you what’s going on, thus ending the annoyance of trying to think and make assumptions.
4. The movie’s humour softens your exasperation: if it doesn’t take itself seriously, why should you?
5. A bit sad that your favourite character just died.
6. To hell with this!
7. You love where this is going.
8. Complete satisfaction. Now you need to light a cigarette.

The Cabin in the Woods
photo www.moviedeskback.com

The more or less delicious dish

This food needs to be tasty and weird. So in order to achieve that, we need to combine one of the cheapest ingredients, if we can even call it that, and one of the most expensive: I give you the whimsical and allusive Popcorn and Caviar.

It is important that there’s more popcorn at the top and more caviar at the bottom, so that the excitement grows gradually. Your costumer will be like “whaaat?” Or, should he be more of the well bred type, he’ll say something close to ”This makes me think about popcorn in a whole new light. It is, if you like, a postmodern approach to popcorn, where one is forced to contemplate the mechanics at work in the making of this apparently simple food, while being served with a reflection of ourselves as popcorn consumers or makers, all this while enjoying the strangest combination of delicious food.”

Merçi beaucoup, will then say your costumer, while looking at you as if you were some long estranged dear friend. This, ladies and gentlemen, is the magic of Cabin in the Woods Caviar Popcorn.

Here is the trailer:

http://youtu.be/7ENUBUdFswM

Coming next: Cloud Atlas and In the Mood for Love.

by Alexa Băcanu

Alexa Băcanu is a private investigator and awesome mercenary. Interests: everything (except Math and most people). She doesn’t write anywhere else (no one other than us would let her) except in her diary and on public bathroom walls.